what i'm learning

It's been an awfully long time since I wrote a post. And I've missed it. I think its been a combination of not knowing who/if any one reads it, other forms of social media being easier and quicker to use and weird pressure to stop cos that's what everyone seems to be doing. But i actually like blogging, Its time for me. and i get more off my chest, i feel like i'm talking rather than just browsing my instagram or facebook. And as a new mum of two, i need this. I'm learning a lot and here is exactly where i want to share my new feelings and thoughts.

So, my little daughter Hazel was born almost 2 months ago. It's been such an amazing time as a family, adjusting and getting to know her. And in this time, due to the copious amounts of time I have to sit and think, i'm learning a lot about this parenting thing.

I'm learning that its about taking it slow. Both physically and mentally.
I'm learning to not have expectations, but instead be amazed at the pace my children do things.
I'm learning that i'm glad i do things my way, popular or unpopular.
I'm learning its ok to carry your baby and strap them to you if it brings both peace and calm.
I'm learning that its also ok to let them sleep, lie, sit alone. I am not neglecting them.
I'm learning to love the moments i have alone with my 3 year old son, doing the things we both love.
I'm learning to have at least 30 minutes of time in the evenings child free before going to sleep.
I'm learning to love 6am wake ups, walking outside barefoot watching the sun rise and listening to the birds start their busy day.
I'm learning to always have something baked in the kitchen for the tiring afternoons. And to use the biggest tea cup!
I'm learning to embrace wardrobe changes- the amount of clothes I go through cos the baby strapped to me also vomits on me.
I'm learning the importance of time just staring at my baby, making eye contact and smiling together.
I'm learning tricks to keep the house clean, like fresh flowers around the place, encouraging me to tidy so they don't get hidden.
I'm learning, that tidying also doesn't have to happen, and that's ok.
I'm learning the importance of seeing other adult human beings during the week, especially when my husband is working.
I'm learning to have ready made pastry in the freezer for dinners that seemed too hard to cook without it!
I'm learning to not feel too guilty if I have to tell my husband, I just cannot cook.
I'm learning that its not selfish of me to serve my meal first and even finish it before helping my kids.
I'm learning that's its not wrong of me to lie and say there are no more muffins, while i hide and eat the last muffin.
I'm learning that two kids is hard. But so amazingly wonderful and i cannot wait to watch the relationship between the two of them grow.
I'm learning to stop stressing about the how and when and just let things unfold.
I'm learning to be patient.